There once was a man in Canberra who was interested in me, as much as I was interested in him - or so it seemed. After meeting through friends and getting on well we had started communicating over the phone/email/text. It was nice - but me being me I wanted things to proceed and he was keen to come and visit me. But then he saw the price of flights from Melbourne to Canberra and was a bit put off - not enough to cancel, just to save up a bit. So we kept talking and finally I told him that I'm looking for a serious relationship and while it's nice to talk and email I really think we need to spend some time together in order to really get to know each other better. Considering I'd seen him twice in Canberra, it only seemed fair that he travel to Melbourne. I've put myself out time and time again for men who aren't prepared to do the same for me and this time I was determined not to do that. I also said that if things did proceed that while I'd be happy to move to Canberra and stay with him for a year or so, I wasn't happy with the idea of living in Canberra forever. It's far too cold for me and even one year would be tough.
So this was the bit he couldn't handle. It seems he is finally settled somewhere and has a well paid job. Having put down roots he doesn't want to move again. He's also built some friendships there and feels there are people in the community who depend on him too much.
For a very fledgling relationship I'm feeling quite devastated about this. He is such a lovely, caring, intelligent man who I feel a great connection with. I know he was keen on me as well - but as I said to him - obviously not keen enough to compromise. I held such high hopes for a future with this man - now I feel as though it's loneliness forever. At one stage when we were talking I said 'so I guess it's goodbye then', he said, 'well not necessarily..' I stopped him as I've been in too many long painful drawn out relationships going nowhere - maybe I shouldn't have, I don't know - but I find ambiguity very difficult and I don't move on unless ties are cut.